Paraskevidekatriaphobia is the fear of Friday the 13th. To mark the date this year, I thought I’d look at some other phobias of the modern computing world.

Fourofourophobia – The fear that the web page you were looking at just yesterday and need again today will not be found.

Keanuphobia – The fear that, if computers and servers can be virtualized, perhaps the whole world has been virtualized and you’re just a digital construct living a digital life. For some people, this is less a phobia and more wishful thinking that they could learn kung-fu with a phone call, if only they knew the right number.

Memephobia – The fear of lolcats, cheezburgers, badgers, zombies, and Rick Astley. Not an altogether irrational phobia, but never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down.

Technonephophobia – The fear that the cloud is actually a cloud in the sky, constantly watching you and tracking your movements from above. It’s not, of course. It’s probably a poor metaphor, anyway.

Txtofobia – The fear that you have, or will, completely lose the ability to spell words normally. Kthxbai.

Virtualiphobia – The fear that your virtualized servers might disappear without a trace, as if they’d never existed. In actuality, our vmForge cluster is extremely reliable and has built-in redundancy. Your servers aren’t going anywhere unless the hardware node fails and High-Availability automatically kicks them over to another node. For even more protection, LogicMonitor provides a calm reassuring voice (with charts) that everything’s fine, and CrashPlan provides scheduled backups of your data.